Skip to main content


Hallo 2018

Hallo 2018,

Semoga aku bisa lebih ikhlas dan percaya dengan ketetapan Allah.
Semoga aku bisa lebih berpegang dengan keyakinan bahwa everything comes in the right time
Semoga aku bisa selalu membanggakan dan membahagiakan mama dan papa

semoga segala berkah, ridho dan karunianya selalu Allah berikan kepada ku, mama papa, kakak-kakak-ku dan kamu.
Recent posts

Kind of feminist

Can't we just livin in a simple life ?

I mean... umm...
sejujurnya, hidup jaman sekarang itu ngga akan lepas dari social media sih, there's plus and minus about that also. Cuma.... banyak banget orang-orang yang pinter tapi ngga aware (menurut gue). Ngga, gue gamau ngomongin Palestine, 212, setnov atau any political issues. There's something simple about woman.


Back to several days ago, 21 years old me, ngelihat seorang pemerempuan menyuarakan "persamaan gender", menyuarakan wanita itu properti dan lain-lain. It sounds cool. But to see what happens these days... Me as a Woman, sometimes feel ashamed to those people. Don't get me wrong....

tanpa bermaksud untuk merendahkan wanita lain atau mengenaralisir para aktivis perempuan, It's just some of them. Not everyone. and this truly my humble opinion, which I have rights to say so.

Kalau permasalahannya tentang KDRT, pelecehan seksual and stuff, you go girl. Raise your voice. Tapi kok, yang gue liha…

quarter crisis of life

Back the 5 years ago. 2012.
Gue adalah sosok;
 - anak kuliahan S1
 - belum pusing mikirin skripsi
 - kerjaannya main-main mulu, happy-happy
 - ga punya beban
 - IPK ya so so lah...
 - single and extremely happy
 - full optimistic of life

Now, 2017
Gue adalah;
 - Mahasiswa last semester S2, yg lagi harap-harap cemas nunggu nilai keluar untuk sidang tesis
 - Pusing mikirin abing kuliah "magang atau cari kerja? maunya si married aja lol"
 - Banyak sih waktu buat main-main but can not. just can not let my self.
 - Have no fix income, still a part-time MUA
 - Single & Independent (seriously, I have a very big trust issues to a man)
 - There's a lot lot of burden on my arms.

and I keep asking to Allah, what should I do next?

Moving on

Jadi, seseorang pernah bilang kalo move on itu sebenernya adalah berpindah dari satu pijakan ke pijakan lainnya. Either pijakan yang sebelumnya itu Indah banget ataupun bitter banget, ya lo pindah ke pijakan berikutnya. Yang jadi masalah adalah apakah lo berani atau ngga ambil peluang untuk berpindah ke pijakan baru tersebut.

Karena yang lo tau cuma kondisi di pijakan lo sekarang. Seindah apapun pijakan lo sekarang ga ada yang ngejamin pijakan berikutnya ga lebih indah dari pijakan lo sekarang bisa aja sesuatu yang lebih indah ada disana. Se bitter apapun pijakan lo sekarang ngga ada yang ngejamin kalo pijakan berikutnya akan lebih indah bahkan bisa aja bakal lebih buruk.

Moving on itu proses. Proses untuk mengikhlaskan apa yang sudah terjadi untuk tetap tinggal di waktu itu dan memulai pijakan baru. Ketika gue bilang okay "I moving on" bukan berarti gue sudah berada di titik gue bener-bener di kehidupan yang baru, karena sebenernya itu adalah sebuah proses.

Dan proses itu y…

I want a simple life

If i can imagine my life would be,
Honestly, I just want a simple life. Not that glamorous but enough with everything.

I don't wish having a super-rich man as my man. I only need the one I can rely on.

The one I can share my favorite song while driving on long road-trip. Having the same adventurous desire and let me being his Co-Assistant, and checkin' places we wrote on our bucket list

The one who love riding a jet coaster or any thrilling rides and having a big laugh after, yelling out loud "shit, this is insane" after the ride is done, we can't help our self to start in line again

The one who allow me, and accompany me hiking any mountain. Allow me camping with him. Allow me taking a lot lot lot of photos of mountain, grass, flowers, or any insects I found.

The one who wants to watch a MU match in old trafold, but if he likes chelsea in stamford, Liverpool in Anfield or arsenal in Emirasy, I am still okay with that as long as it is England.

The one who love ac…

I forgive you

melakukan kesalahan itu manusiawi merasa sakit hati itu juga manusiawi marah dan kecewa setelah disakiti ? manusiawi
we're only human after all.
There are always two sides of every story. I knew mine, & I don't know yours. Even you try to explain me, I believe I will never understand it.
I've read somewhere, the one who hurts people, is the one who needs heals the most.  So here I am, I pray for your peace in life. I hope your healing process went very well.
Surprisingly, I don't hate you girl. Maybe, I was really mad at you for ruin my dreams. But not anymore.
This is gonna be a very precious thing for me to learn. Not easily gave my trust. Share my dream. to a person I thought the world for me. I know I was young & dumb, I always said YOLO, you only live once, so live it to fullest. Even I don't even understand yet, what is the meaning of life.  It's my fault. Not you. You just make it worse.
But I learn so much. I finally understand, what I want in l…

I can't tolerate bully anymore

People growing old but doesn't mean they're growing up. I'm wondering why is it so hard being nice to people ? If you can't, why is it hard to remain silent.
So, I have a fried, my high-school friend, he seems having mental retardation. Well, not in an extreme way, he just can not really caught up with our school lessons, but he isn't kind of lazy person. He sometimes hard to talked to. And yeah, he often becomes a bully victim in my school.  What kind of bully ? well, it aint like on TV, he still have a friend, we're all still being friends with him, but he's like our clown. He even didn't realize that he's a bully victim. A sad truth aint ?
I thought as we grow older everything changed. I often saw him keep playing around with my friends and I thought there's no such a thing, like a bully things anymore to him. until one day, in our group chat he sent us offerings. He seems working as a sales marketing now in some developer, he offers us a new…